It reminds me of Tim O’Brien’s book, The Things They Carried, which follows Alpha Company through the Vietnam War and explores how people carry both the visible and the invisible. Our own lives echo with that truth: we are shaped just as much by what we hold internally as by what others see from the outside.

And across any given year, we accumulate more than we ever stop to notice.

Some of it is chosen.
Some of it arrives quietly.
Some of it becomes heavier the longer we hold it.
And some of it, without us realizing, shapes who we are becoming.

As this year winds down, it’s time to think about the things you carried, individually and collectively. Not as a list of accomplishments or unfinished goals, but as a more honest accounting of the emotional, mental, relational, and identity “weight” you’ve held from January to now.

Because before we step into a new year, it’s worth pausing long enough to notice what’s in our “pack”.

What We Carry Without Seeing

Most of us walk through our year accumulating responsibilities, expectations, and emotions the way a traveler collects items on a long journey. Piece by piece, moment by moment, we pick things up:

• A new project or expanded role
• The emotional labor of supporting a teammate
• A worry we didn’t talk about
• A relationship that took more energy than we expected
• A sense of possibility that surprised us
• Pressure to keep performing at a level that stretched us thin
• Moments of courage and creativity that we didn’t give ourselves credit for

Some of these things fueled us.
Others quietly drained us.
Many sat somewhere in between, part of the landscape, unnoticed until we stop moving long enough to feel their weight.

Years are like that.
They hand us things we didn’t ask for, and they offer things we needed more than we realized.
Most of the time, we carry both.

What You Carried Well

Before we talk about setting anything down, it’s worth recognizing what you carried well this year.

You carried moments of strength — even when they didn’t feel like strength at the time.
You carried responsibility in ways that supported others.
You carried uncertainty and still showed up.
You carried growth, even when it came disguised as challenge.
You carried parts of yourself that are emerging: new interests, new clarity, new courage.
You carried boundaries you once might have abandoned.
You carried relationships that mattered to you.

These are not small things.
They are the steady acts of becoming. Quiet, intentional, and often uncelebrated.

One of the great gifts of reflection is realizing that you’ve handled more than you acknowledged. That you already have evidence of resilience, capability, and compassion stitched throughout your year.

What Became Too Heavy

At the same time, not everything we carry is meant to be carried indefinitely.

Some responsibilities grew heavier as the year unfolded.
Some expectations, from yourself or from others, shifted from motivating to burdensome.
Some commitments lingered past their usefulness.
Some roles no longer aligned with who you are becoming.
Some habits drained more energy than they gave.
Some identities you’ve outgrown yet continued to follow you.

And perhaps most quietly of all:
Some emotional or relational weight simply became too much. Not, because you are failing, but because you are human.

It’s important to name this without judgment.

Weight is not a measure of worth.
What became heavy is simply data — an invitation to reflect.

What You’re Ready to Set Down

This is the part of the year that asks us to pause.
To place the figurative pack on the ground.
To look at what we’ve been hauling through meetings, projects, seasons, and transitions.

Not everything you carried belongs in the year ahead.

Setting something down is not quitting.
It is clarity.
It is coherence.
It is choosing alignment over accumulation.

As the year resets, take a moment to pause and notice what you carried — and what you no longer need to hold.

Ask yourself:

• What did you carry well this year?What strengthened you, taught you, or helped you grow?
• What became too heavy?What drained your energy, blurred your boundaries, or weighed on your mind?
• What are you ready to set down?Which expectations, habits, responsibilities, or stories no longer fit who you’re becoming?
• What weight needs to be shared instead of shouldered alone?
• What carried you when you needed it most?Who supported you, grounded you, or renewed your sense of possibility?

There is relief in letting go.
But more importantly, there is space —
space for clarity,
space for energy,
space for deeper alignment with what matters most.

A new season will come soon enough.
You’ve carried a lot this year — more than you may ever know.
And you don’t have to carry it all into the next one.